Breast-Free For Me (for now)

I have a tendency to make light of situations I perhaps should not.  This may be one of them.  You have been warned.

I am a bit over 7 weeks post mastectomy.  Boob-free.  Scar heavy, tight skinned and still lacking in full shoulder range of motion.  I have returned to almost all of my activities, but am still struggling with full wheel position (back-bend) and shoulder stand.  I know, this is not something all 43 year olds feel the need to do, but I do.  I can, however, do a cart-wheel, and I have put a few tight yoga tops on without even paying the slightest attention to my chest.  Big breakthroughs.

I find myself thinking about breast reconstruction, as I have many times in the past, as I spent 7 years quite lop-sided.  I have always been "small", as in, training bras were my staple.  I have never given "enhancement" any thought, other than, "why the hell would someone DO that????".  I could not understand why someone would put a foreign body into a healthy chest.  I admit my bias has been toward breast cancer - keep away from potentially cancerous substances being put in the body.

So here I sit.  Flat chested beyond words.  My sternum sticks out.  It is like my boobs were scooped out with huge ice creams scoopers and left craters in my chest.  I didn't really know how this would look.  I guess I need to pump up my pects.

I could meet with a plastic surgeon and really go over my options.  Muscle flaps or implants.  Neither option is appealing to me.  I am still not willing to part with any muscle (abdominal or latissimus dorsi) in order to enhance my chest, and between the radiation I had on the right and my current aversion to silicon, implants are not likely.  So....breast-free?

There are some real benefits to being breast-free.  No bras!  Really.  NO BRAS!  I believe many women forget how annoying bras really are.  They itch, move up, stretch out, and interfere with many good outfits.  I don't have this issue anymore.  I can buy all those cute summer tops and not wonder how to hide bra straps.  I can bend forward as much as I want, and I am not going to fall out of any top.  I can wear strapless, backless and unsupported anything.  Very cool.

The question becomes: Can I be a "real girl", can I be "sexy", can I feel good about my body without those frontal bumps our culture has given so much value to?  Well,

 why the hell not? 

Breasts do not the sexy me make.  I refuse to give breasts the power to determine my loveliness, my desirability, my self-esteem. I am a breast-free, cancer-free mom force.  I will dance, run, walk and do yoga to my hearts content, without a bra, and quite happily. And I will tell other women how incredibly wonderful they are, just as they are, no more surgery required.